Middle class Northern Mum introduces her brood to the joys of Quorn - for what’s not to like about cod chicken? - prompting outburst from well-bovvered schoolgirl daughter, an avid Catherine Tate Show viewer, who comes over all proprietorial about her fave fungus-based foodstuff. ‘Touch my food, feel my fork!‘ she snarls at ‘bucket head’ brother - challenging the received wisdom that veggie = tree hugging philanthropist. ‘What am I supposed to eat, now?’ she whinges. Give the mung bean munching madam a snail and whelk smoothie and tell her she’s not leaving the table until she finishes
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